OK, OK, so not *all* cowboys look like that ^, but look at the ruggedness this picture implies. This guy looks like he knows what it feels like to break a sweat from working hard. This guy looks like he isn’t afraid to get dirt under his nails. This guy looks like he is not afraid to carry a heavy load. He looks capable and strong. And above all, Manly.
The incident that sparked the idea for this post happened last weekend, while at the neighborhood pool party. We live in quintessential Suburbia. (For more of my thoughts on that subject, refer to my old blog, called SuburbaPhobe) My kids wanted to go to the neighborhood pool party, so I happily grudgingly took them. It was around 100° and it was overcrowded. (Hence the word “party”, huh?)
The kids were in line to have their picture taken, and there was a wasp on the wall behind where they were to stand. My son freaked out (he stirred up a wasp’s nest a couple of years ago and has never forgotten what it feels like to be stung multiple times simultaneously) (I don’t blame him), so I wanted to get rid of the wasp.
I wasn’t wearing shoes, so I asked the people nearest to me (a group of 2 men, and a teenaged boy and girl) if they wouldn’t mind taking off their flip flop and smacking the wasp. The men looked at each other, completely baffled at what to do. One hem-hawed to the other about how *he* should go do it. Then *he* was all, “No way, Jose!” Since neither of them were manning up, I asked one of them for his shoe and killed the wasp and handed his flip flop back to him – with what I hope was a textbook look of disdain on my face as I did so.
This was the inspiration for my post today.
As a girl, I never bought into the fantasy of needing a Prince Charming to rescue me from, well… anything. I had dreams of “what I would be when I grew up” and they always included me working in the career of my choosing. Example: I had such an elaborate set-up for playing “Teacher”, that someone in my family had a plaque made for my desk that was engraved with “Miss Cindy Love”. (That was the name I had made up for my Teacher Persona) I was also a waitress and doctor and a scientist. Point is, no one told me that I couldn’t be anything I wanted to be just because I was a girl.
I was never once taught that men were “too much” and women were “less than”.
I was never taught that women were better than men or vice versa.
I was never taught that I needed to deny my nature in order to succeed in life.
So when did the shift in gender ideology happen?
— When did The Celebration of Women come to mean The Denigration of Men?
— When did women start being masculine and men start being feminine?
As you can see, I’m not a big fan of gender equality across the board.
I’m about to venture out into some dangerous territory here, and say something that is not PC. (I hate PC, by the way). I think that men and women *are* different. ::SHOCKER::
Genetically, they’re different. Physically they’re different. Emotionally and physiologically and hormonally, they are different. AND NONE OF THESE THINGS ARE A BAD THING.
A man opening a door for a woman doesn’t mean that she isn’t capable of doing it herself. That act of courtesy shows he holds his woman in high esteem. A man is supposed to have muscles in places that women don’t because they work they were created to do is different than the work a woman was created to do. Men are supposed to provide for the family they created while the woman takes care of the kids, because women were created with wombs and breasts and oxytocin and men weren’t. Men are supposed to kill wasps, not because women can’t, but in order that they may show their willingness to protect others.
I believe that the only arena where men and women are completely equal is intellect. We have the same capacity for learning and understanding. There is no inequality in matters of the mind.
I say, let men be men and women be women. Embrace both strengths and differences. The basics aren’t really all that confusing, are they? Really? What’s so wrong with that?